Hello Friends and Lovers,
I am sitting here on a lovely city evening in the District. The sun is setting and my music is playing. I am feeling quiet, within myself that is. I'm striving anyway. But let's jump two clicks back.
Saturday night was a BLAST. I met some cool people and ate some Amazing food. Probably the highlight of the evening. And that's not because the people weren't cool, it is because the food was just that freaking amazing. There were can-can dancers, expats, the aforementioned drool-worthy food, french champagne, girls who had lived in Aix recently, British boys, and a whole lot of fun. It was almost everything 'd hoped for, it still blew me away. I would love to go back. Who knows, maybe next year?
Sunday was a great day as well, beautiful and hot. I strolled Eastern Market and went to Costco! Oh simple joys. Although, now I have 10 lbs of oatmeal and I informed Melanie I will be taking it to Spain. She said to have fun, but she'll be eating Spanish cuisine. I said damn. I got some good fruits and veggies for spectacular prices and headed home. Epic movie was on its way. We watched Philadelphia, which I had surprisingly never seen. it was remarkable, and Tom Hanks phenomenal. So everything was fairly par for that. I went to bed satisfied.
I am so thankful for the things in my life and when things happen it makes me even more so. I have such a deep support system. I have so many who love me and I know I can go to any one of them at any time. Well maybe minus one, but, oh well. So when I lose a friend to suicide, as I was informed that I did over the weekend I feel so much. So much emotion courses through me and around me. I am happy to be alive, sad to be alone, confused about meanings, lost without my footing and basically just shaken to the core. These things happen; frequently as I've found out. but I still don't get less affected by them. I can't even explain my feeling, it is just FEELING and emotions. I feel raw and human, stripped away of any enamel that has been applied in coats over time and acclimation. I find myself a stranger in every sense but closer to myself than ever before. I realize that I am one step nearer to learning what I seek, but feel so much further away because I am beginning to realize the true distance that separates me from my answers.
BUT, then there are things that can always bring me up One of those is my sister, another in my dog, and the other, possibly most powerful one is Harry Potter. Laugh if you will, but at least you don't see me gorging myself on chocolate. I went to HBP at midnight and it was a complete panacea. Now I sit and contemplate. I need to do laundry. I am going to work out. Jeremy, Jonah, and Dennis come here tomorrow. Thank you, thank you world. I know some things, and one of them is, well, let's just say it hangs around my neck.
Song:"Tin Pan Alley (Aka Roughest Place In Town)" Stevie Ray Vaughan